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greatest sledges ever!!

 
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kunalrsingh
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 8:48 am Post subject: greatest sledges ever!! Reply with quote

 Rod  Marsh  &  Ian  Botham:
 When  Botham  took  guard  in  an  Ashes  match,  Marsh  welcomed  him  to  the  wicket  with  the  immortal  words:  "So  how's  your  wife  &  my  kids?"
 Botham  retort  was  "Wife  is  fine,  kids  are  retarded"
 
 Daryll  Cullinan  &  Shane  Warne:
 As  Cullinan  was  on  his  way  to  the  wicket,  Warne  told  him  he  had  been  waiting  2  years  for  another  chance  to  humiliate  him.  "Looks  like  you  spent  it  eating,"  Cullinan  retorted.
 
 Glenn  McGrath  (bowling  to  portly  Zimbabwean  chicken  farmer  Eddo  Brandes):
 "Hey  Eddo,  why  are  you  so    fat?"
 Eddo  Brandes:  "Because  every  time  I    your  mother,  she  throws  me  a  biscuit."
 
 Robin  Smith  &  Merv  Hughes:
 During  1989  Lords  Test,  Hughes  said  to  Smith  after  he  played  &  missed:  "You  can't    bat."  
 Smith  to  Hughes  after  he  smacked  him  to  the  boundary:  "Hey  Merv,  we  make  a  fine  pair.  I  can't    bat  &  you  can't    bowl."
 
 Merv  Hughes  &  Javed  Miandad:  
 During  1991  Adelaide  Test,  Javed  called  Merv  a  fat  bus  conductor.  A  few  balls  later  Merv  dismissed  Javed.  "Tickets  please,"  Merv  called  out  as  he  ran  past  the  departing  batsman.
 
 Merv  Hughes  &  Viv  Richards:
 During  a  test  match  in  the  West  Indies,  Hughes  didn't  say  a  word  to  Viv,  but  continued  to  stare  at  him  after  deliveries.  "This  is  my  island,  my  culture.  Don't  you  be  staring  at  me.  In  my  culture  we  just  bowl."  Merv  didn't  reply,  but  after  he  dismissed  him  he  announced  to  the  batsman:  "In  my  culture  we  just  say    off."
 
 Ian  Healy  &  Arjuna  Ranatunga:  
 And  of  course  you  can't  forget  Ian  Healy's  legendary  comment  which  was  picked  up  by  the  Channel  9  microphones  when  Arjuna  Ranatunga  called  for  a  runner  on  a  particularly  hot  night  during  a  one-dayer  in  Sydney:  "You  don't  get  a  runner  for  being  an  overweight,  unfit,  fat  !"
 
 James  Ormond  &  Mark  Waugh  
 Ormand  had  just  come  out  to  bat  on  an  Ashes  tour  and  was  greeted  by  Mark  Waugh.
 MW:  "  me,  look  who  it  is.  Mate,  what  are  you  doing  out  here?  There's  no  way  you're  good  enough  to  play  for  England."
 JO:  "Maybe  not,  but  at  least  I'm  the  best  player  in  my  family."  
 
 Glenn  McGrath  &  Ramnaresh  Sarwan
 McGrath  to  Sarwan:  "So  what  does  Brian  Lara's  dick  taste  like?"
 Sarwan:  "I  don't  know.  Ask  your  wife."
 McGrath  (losing  it):  "If  you  ever    mention  my  wife  again,  I'll    rip  your    throat  out!"
 
 Mark  Waugh  &  Adam  Parore  
 Waugh  standing  at  second  slip,  the  new  player  (Parore)  comes  to  the  crease  playing  &  missing  the  first  ball.  Mark:  "Oh,  I  remember  you  from  a  couple  years  ago  in  Australia.  You  were  shit  then,  you're    useless  now."
 Parore  (turning  around):  "Yeah,  that's  me.  And  when  I  was  there  you  were  going
 out  with  that  old,  ugly  slut.  And  now  I  hear  you've  married  her,  you  dumb  !"
 
 Ian  Healy  &  Arjuna  Ranatunga
 Yet  another  Australian  witticism  with  this  time  porky  Sri  Lankan  batsman  Arjuna  Ranatunga  the  victim.  Shane  Warne,  trying  to  tempt  the  batsman  out  of  his  crease  mused  what  it  took  to  get  the  plump  character  to  get  out  of  his  crease  and  drive.  Wicketkeeper  Ian  Healy  piped  up,  "Put  a  Mars  Bar  on  a  good  length.  That  should  do  it."
 
 Ravi  Shastri  vs  the  Aussie  12th  man  (don't  remember  who,  and  don't  want  to  slander  anyone)
 Shastri  hits  it  to  this  guy  and  looks  for  a  single.  This  guy  gets  the  ball  in  and  says,  "If  you  leave  the  crease  I'll  break  your    head."
 Shastri:  "If  you  could  bat  as  well  as  you  can  talk  you  wouldn't  be  the    12th  man."
 
 Malcolm  Marshall  &  David  Boon  
 Malcolm  Marshall  was  bowling  to  David  Boon  who  had  played  and  missed  a  couple  of  times.  Marshall:  "Now,  David,  are  you  going  to  get  out  now  or  am  I  going  to  have  to  bowl  around  the  wicket  and  kill  you?"
 
 Fred  Trueman  &  Raman  Subba  Row  
 Fred  Trueman  bowling.  The  batsman  edges  and  the  ball  goes  to  first  slip,  and  right  between  Raman  Subba  Row's  legs.  Fred  doesn't  say  a  word.  At  the  end  of  the  over,  Row  ambles  past  Trueman  and  apologises  sheepishly.  "I  should've  kept  my  legs  together,  Fred.  "So  should  your  mother,"  he  replied.
 
 Viv  Richards  v  Greg  Thomas
 This  incident  took  place  during  a  county  championship  match  between  Glamorgan  and  Somerset.  Glamorgan  paceman  Thomas  had  beaten  Richards'  bat  a  couple  of  times  and  informed  him:  "It's  red,  round  and  weighs  about  five  ounces,  in  case  you  were  wondering."  
 
 The  very  next  ball  Sir  Issac  Vivian  Andrews  Richards  gave  him  the  royal  treament  and  smashed  the  ball  out  of  the  ground,  into  a  nearby  river  -  at  which  point  he  piped  up:  "Greg,  you  know  what  it  looks  like.  Now  go  and  fetch  it."  
 
 Steve  Waugh  &  Parthiv  Patel
 This  happened  during  India's  tour  of  Australia  in  2001.  The  series  was  level  at  1-1.  It  was  the  5th  and  final  test  at  Sydney  and  India  was  4  wickets  away  from  a  historic  series  victory  on  Aussie  soil.  However,  the  aussie  Captain,  Steve  Waugh  was  proving  a  thorn  in  India's  back.  Playing  in  his  last  test  match  (as  he  had  announced  retirement),  he  mounted  a  rear-guard  action  and  was  fighting  for  a  draw,  and  was  the  only  one  who  stood  between  India  and  victory.  In  an  attempt  to  induce  him  to  do  something  foolish,  the  16  year  old  Indian  wicket  keeper  chirps  "  Hey  Steve,  how  about  one  of  those  famous  slog  sweep  of  yours  before  you  leave  forever?".  Waugh,  a  veteran  of  such  tactics  replied  "  Sonny!  You  better  show  some  respect!  You  were  pooping  in  your  diapers  when  I  made  my  debut"  
 
 Sunil  Gavaskar
 Once,  during  the  tour  of  West  Indies,  a  young  bowler  was  trying  to  get  under  Gavaskar's  skin  by  sledging.  Gavaskar,  a  senior  player  retorted  "Son,  don't  waste  time  sledging  at  me.  I  have  been  sledged  at  more  often  than  you  have  taken  a  piss".
 
 Trueman  and  Aussie  batsman
 In  an  England  v  Australia  Test  during  early  1960's  Trueman  was  fielding  close  to  the  gate  from  the  pavilion.  As  a  new  batsman  came  out  he  turned  to  shut  the  gate,  Trueman  said  "Don't  bother  son,  you  won't  be  out  there  long  enough."
 
 Adam  Parore  and  Daryll  Cullinan.
 Because  Cullinan  is  well  known  for  being  Warne's  bunny,  New  Zealand  keeper  Parore  greeted  the  South  African,  carefully  playing  the  first  ball  from  kiwi  Chris  Harris,  with  a  cry  of:  "Bowled  Warnie!"
 
 Healy  &  Hansie
 In  one  of  the  tour  matches  in  South  Africa,  Australia  played  Hansie  Cronje's  province.  Cronje  was  at  the  non  strikers  end,  there  was  a  short  chubby  batsman  on  strike.  Ian  Healy  yelled  to  Warne,  (I  think)  "Bowl  a  Mars  Bar  half  way  down...We'll  get  him  stumped"  The  Aussies  and  Cronje  were  all  in  hysterics.  the  batsman's  retort:  "Nah,  Boonie  fielding  at  short  leg  will  be  onto  it  before  I  can  move."
 
 Bill  Lawry  &  Richie  Benaud
 While  commentating  during  a  match  in  which  Pakistan  was  faring  badly  in  all  departments  of  the  game,  Bill  Lawry,  offering  a  solution  said  "I  think  Pakistan's  problem  is  they've  got  to  relax",  to  which  Benaud  replies  nonchalantly,  "I  don't  agree.  I  think  Pakistan  have  got  to  learn  how  to  bat,  bowl  and  field.  It's  a  simple  game."
 
 David  Hookes  &  Tony  Greig
 Centenary  Test  in  Melbourne  1977.  A  young  David  Hookes  makes  his  way  to  the  crease  in  his  debut  test.  The  English  captain  was  South  African  born  Tony  Greig.
 Greig  :  "When  are  balls  going  to  drop  sonny"
 Hookes  :  "Don't  know  but  at  least  I'm  playing  Cricket  for  my  own  country"
 
 Merv  Hughes  Vs  Hansie  Cronje
 Hughes  was  one  of  the  greatest  exponents  of  the  fine  "art"  of  sledging.  Once  during  a  tour  game  in  South  Africa  Hughes  was  bowling  to  Hansie  Cronje  .  It  was  an  especially  flat  wicket  and  Cronje  was  hitting  Hughes  for  fours  and  sixes  all  over  the  place.
 After  the  umpteenth  boundary,  Hughes  headed  down  the  pitch,  stood  near  Cronje,  let  out  a  fart  and  said:  "Try  hitting  that  for  six."  It  was  five  minutes  before  the  guffawing  stopped  and  play  could  resume.
 
 Viv  Richards  to  Gavaskar
 Gavaskar  had  decided  to  relinquish  his  opening  position  and  come  in  at  no  4  for  that  test.  But,  Malcolm  Marshall  fired  out  Anshuman  Gaekwad  and  Dilip  Vengsarkar  for  ducks,  setting  the  stage  for  Gavaskar  to  walk  in  at  0/2.  And  he  thought  there  would  be  less  pressure!  Viv  Richards  says  "Man,  it  don't  matter  where  you  come  in  to  bat,  the  score  is  still  zero."
 
 Waugh  Vs  Jamie  Siddons:
 In  a  Sheffield  Shield  game  between  NSW  and  SA,  a  Waugh  twin  (not  sure  which)  was  taking  an  enternity  to  take  guard,  asking  the  umpire  for  centre,  middle  and  leg,  two  legs  -  the  whole  lot.  Then  he  steps  away  towards  leg  side  and  has  another  look  around  the  field,  before  re  checking  centre.  Jamie  Siddons  is  at  slip,  and  decided  enough  is  enough.  He  yells  out.  "For  christ  sake,  it's  not  a  'f*ckin  test  match."
 Waugh  replies:  "  Of  course  it  isn't  â€¦  You're  here.  "
 
 Barmy  Army  Vs  Shane  Warne:
 England's  "Barmy  Army"  recently  decided  to  sledge  leg  spinner  Shane  Warne  musically,  and  it  has  been  described  as  boorishly  personal,  but  effective.  The  sledge  was  based  on  Chirpy  Chirpy  Cheep  Cheep  -  the  "Where's  your  poppa  gone?"  Song.  It  has  been  converted  to  "  Where's  your  missus  gone?"  (Warne  had  recently  been  divorced.)
 
 Healy  &  Atherton
 Michael  Atherton,  on  his  first  Tour  to  Australia  was  adjudged  not  out  on  a  caught  behind  appeal.
 At  the  end  of  the  over  Ian  Healey  walked  by  and  announced  "You're  a  f*@$%#*  cheat".  
 Athers  replied  very  politely  "When  in  Rome  dear  boy.......".
 
 
 
 PS:  just  though  that  this  might  be  interesting  for  cricket  buffs.  
 Admin:  please  feel  free  to  remove  this  if  found  unacceptable
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psimhan
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Posts: 2053
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Status: Offline
PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 9:31 am Post subject: Re: greatest sledges ever!! Reply with quote

 Read  some  new  ones  today!
 Liked  the  "Looks  like  you  spent  it  eating"  one  especially.
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aquaboy
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Joined: Dec 04, 2007
Posts: 192
Location: Chennai

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 12:09 pm Post subject: Re: greatest sledges ever!! Reply with quote

 really  enjoyed  it,  cool.
 
 Aquaboy.
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arvindshetty
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Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 724
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:48 pm Post subject: Re: greatest sledges ever!! Reply with quote

 nice  1  Clapping  
 
 liked  what  sarwan  said  to  mcgrath   ROFL   ROFL
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